Daily Practice of Self Care
- Become intentional about taking time to rest. No one else knows your schedule—don’t wait for someone else to tell you.
- Schedule time with yourself for reflection. Protect it.
- Schedule time with family. Protect it: as a “commitment”
- Listen to your self-script regularly. It’s contagious. Challenge it
- Leave your work/routine/& get away—break the pattern
- Listen for signs of fatigue: irritability, lack of focus, etc.
- Schedule laughter, play, distraction
- Exercise. It’s a stress buster
- Give yourself permission to doubt/not care/rest/stop/leave things undone
- ASK: How much of what I’m hearing is MY responsibility?
- Remember: I neither control, change, nor fix others
- I am not the whole problem
- What is actually urgent—and where is the urgency coming from?
- Why am I anxious? Identify the issue—it reduces the fear
- Don’t respond to an issue immediately: reflect/act
- Accept what is not in your control to affect
- Quit trying to undo yesterday. It’s done—hopefully forgiven
- How much of what I’m doing is to buy acceptance?
- Watch for compliance/hostility/rebellion
- Understand that selection means rejection (for now)
- Believe that some important things cost pain/time
- What is most difficult for me to ask for?
- Not everyone will like what I choose
- Not everyone will understand what I do—now
- To care for oneself is not the same as being selfish
- There is a difference between hurting and harming
- Blame, guilt, and forgiveness can be weapons of power
- “Religious” behavior is not always redemptive
Issues in Personal Development
- Are you taking ownership of your own thoughts, feelings, choices?
- What power are you aware of, and how are you using it?
- What motivates you? Fear, shame, guilt, conscience, values, love
- How much responsibility are you taking for issues you can’t control?
- Are you focusing mostly on regrets or gratitude and grace?
- What boundaries need most careful attention?
- Which relationships (or messages) are toxic in your journey?
- To what degree are you an actor—vs. reactor, in decisions?
- Do you have an identified community that nurtures you?
- Are there some disciplines in your life?
Obstacles to Growth / Theologies to Develop
- Can you live with some degree of ambiguity?
(Do you have a theology of mystery?) - Can you understand doubt as fuel for discovery and faith?
(Do you understand faith as a process?) - Can you follow in the darkness—while you wait?
(Do you have a theology for the winter–& silence?) - Have you learned to listen for the Spirit’s voice in community?
(Do you have a theology of relationship & accountability?) - Can you make commitments to specific “opportunities”?
(Are there some vows you are willing to take?) - What is your understanding of a Presence in your life?
(How do you experience the Spirit?) - To what degree have you understood grace and love?
(What small portion of grace and love do you understand?)