Daily Practice of Self Care

  • Become intentional about taking time to rest. No one else knows your schedule—don’t wait for someone else to tell you.
  • Schedule time with yourself for reflection. Protect it.
  • Schedule time with family. Protect it: as a “commitment”
  • Listen to your self-script regularly. It’s contagious. Challenge it
  • Leave your work/routine/& get away—break the pattern
  • Listen for signs of fatigue: irritability, lack of focus, etc.
  • Schedule laughter, play, distraction
  • Exercise. It’s a stress buster
  • Give yourself permission to doubt/not care/rest/stop/leave things undone
  • ASK: How much of what I’m hearing is MY responsibility?
  • Remember: I neither control, change, nor fix others
  • I am not the whole problem
  • What is actually urgent—and where is the urgency coming from?
  • Why am I anxious? Identify the issue—it reduces the fear
  • Don’t respond to an issue immediately: reflect/act
  • Accept what is not in your control to affect
  • Quit trying to undo yesterday. It’s done—hopefully forgiven
  • How much of what I’m doing is to buy acceptance?
  • Watch for compliance/hostility/rebellion
  • Understand that selection means rejection (for now)
  • Believe that some important things cost pain/time
  • What is most difficult for me to ask for?
  • Not everyone will like what I choose
  • Not everyone will understand what I do—now
  • To care for oneself is not the same as being selfish
  • There is a difference between hurting and harming
  • Blame, guilt, and forgiveness can be weapons of power
  • “Religious” behavior is not always redemptive

Issues in Personal Development

  • Are you taking ownership of your own thoughts, feelings, choices?
  • What power are you aware of, and how are you using it?
  • What motivates you? Fear, shame, guilt, conscience, values, love
  • How much responsibility are you taking for issues you can’t control?
  • Are you focusing mostly on regrets or gratitude and grace?
  • What boundaries need most careful attention?
  • Which relationships (or messages) are toxic in your journey?
  • To what degree are you an actor—vs. reactor, in decisions?
  • Do you have an identified community that nurtures you?
  • Are there some disciplines in your life?

Obstacles to Growth / Theologies to Develop

  • Can you live with some degree of ambiguity?
    (Do you have a theology of mystery?)
  • Can you understand doubt as fuel for discovery and faith?
    (Do you understand faith as a process?)
  • Can you follow in the darkness—while you wait?
    (Do you have a theology for the winter–& silence?)
  • Have you learned to listen for the Spirit’s voice in community?
    (Do you have a theology of relationship & accountability?)
  • Can you make commitments to specific “opportunities”?
    (Are there some vows you are willing to take?)
  • What is your understanding of a Presence in your life?
    (How do you experience the Spirit?)
  • To what degree have you understood grace and love?
    (What small portion of grace and love do you understand?)